I turn 45 this month. Forty-five years old. Wow…how did I get here so fast? As the second half of my life begins, all I can think about now is how this body and mind will get me through the next 45 with everything I want to do and at the pace I want to do it. And as I reflect on the past and think about the future, I am reminded of what one of my best friends told me a long time ago. Wherever you go, there you are. Someone famous might have said it, I’m not sure, but I’m giving her credit since she shared it with me.
The idea is that no matter your location, your place in life, who you share it with, or what you might be dealing with or working on, wherever you are, there you are. We cannot escape ourselves.We cannot run or hide from our actions, our thoughts, our needs, our struggles. When you think about your life, what has been a consistent issue that keeps you from being totally fulfilled? What continues to cause you frustration, anxiety or pain and gets in the way of your wholeness? What are you not facing? My long term frustration is my weight.
About the time I started my new business, I came down with a virus that attacked my joints. I could barely move or walk. I thought “this is a sign”, that this was a taste of what it might feel like to be elderly. And it has finally spurred me to take action about how I take care of myself, mentally and physically. I have always had a battle with my weight. As most girls growing up in the 70’s and 80’s, I was obsessed with losing weight. Cheryl Tiegs and Farrah Fawcett, Olivia Newton-John and Madonna…oh, to be as trim as the girls in Young Miss or Seventeen. I have spent years trying all the fads…you know the ones…Beverly Hills diet, Cabbage Soup diet, All Protein diet (that was a good one- all that bacon!), everything-fat-free diet and we could go on.
I am so tired of thinking about how I would be so much happier if I just lost weight. But no matter where I went in life, there I was. So at 45, I have decided to stop the insanity (literally, I cannot do one more of those videos). No matter where I go or what I spend my time on, my health (not my weight) will be my focus. I hope to come back to you in six months to tell you about my progress in no longer carrying the burden of this struggle. And that I have become a healthier person in the process. But wherever I am, there I’ll be, and I’ll be happy. You want to join me? Drop me a line in the comments and tell me what you’re determined to do differently going forward. It’s tough letting go of old habits, but if we encourage each other I know we can do it!
(Photo: Blogger Robin Ahearn (left on both photos) poses with a friend in 1986 and now.)