“Success means having the courage, the determination and the will to become the person you believe you were meant to be.” – George Sheehan

Recently, a dear sweet friend of mine and I were having an open and vulnerable conversation about the importance of not only accepting who you are, the good and the bad, but having the courage and the confidence to be true to who you are meant to be.

My friend was venting about how she was tired of not being accepted for the characteristics that make her uniquely her, like her loudness and infectious laugh. She felt people sometimes judged her because she does not whisper and sometimes breaks the invisible sound barrier that others can inflict upon us. Notice I said “us”. That’s because I know those judgmental and annoyed looks (you do too!) all to well, because I, too, am a person whose voice tends to rise and break invisible sound barriers when I am passionate about a subject. Is that wrong? Is it a crime? Should we be made to wear the scarlet L (for “loud”) for it? I think not. I think we should be celebrated for being passionate!

We then went on to share how we both feel like we are going through personal transitions that will both define and confirm for each of us in our own different way, who we are and who we will be moving forward in life.

I am currently reading the book “Identity” by Charlotte Gambill and what I’m discovering and shared with my dear friend is that the names, labels and roles that we let people attach to us can give a wrong impression of who we are. They can limit the way we see ourselves and the way that people see us…if we let them.

“Your personality is what attracts certain people and things into your life over others….if you don’t know who you are, then other people will try to define you….when people question what you do, respond confidently, because you have learned to be secure in who you are, not in who people think you should be,” Gambill says in her book. “Jesus was given many labels and badges in his lifetime, but he refused to wear any of them…Why? Because when you are 100% confident in who you are as a person, you need nothing else to define you. Jesus didn’t come to be defined. He arrived knowing who he was and where he was journeying to, so he was totally himself.”

The question is are you expressing your originality 100% and being the work of art that you were created to be? Ask yourself these questions:

1.    What makes you unique? Because I believe that I was not meant to be ordinary, I can say for certain that my body and spirit, while imperfect, was molded to be extraordinary. It’s a part of my DNA. You see, I have always felt the need to be extraordinary. For me, good is never good enough. I always feel the need to maximize something to a level of greatness, but not just for me, but for others. And I tend to try and take those around me along for the journey.

2.    What is your original makeup? These are some of the ingredients that make up my potter’s clay in no certain order: extraordinary, leader, servant, visionary, creative, my smile, passionate, traveler, integrity, let’s not forget sometimes loud, daughter, sister, ex-wife, cheerful, at times, impatient, good listener, colorful, supportive, excellence, approachable, strategic, stylish, innovative, lover of purple, smart, driven, flexible, adaptable, very intuitive, organized, positive, confident, fearful of public speaking, hopeful, strong in faith, responsible, dependable, fun loving, feeler, romantic, unlucky in love, go-getter, out-of-the-box, storyteller, long winded, oddly decisive and indecisive, and a glass more than full…spilling over kind of girl. It’s not important that this is not a complete list. What’s important is it’s “my list.” Labels that I have given myself based on how I see me. If you cannot create a list of your own, on your own that you can feel good about, then you are probably not being 100% you.

3.    What will be your unique mark? My unique mark involves making sure that I fulfill God’s will and purpose for my life, which I believe is investing in and making a difference in the lives of others and the world. A broad brush stroke of a statement I know, but for me it’s that simple. And I want to fully embrace me, living and enjoying the journey along the way.

The biggest challenge to being 100% you is not knowing who you are. Funny thing about that is…that knowing who you are is a life long journey. Who I am today is the core of who I will be tomorrow, but it is not the final mold. There will be identity defining moments along the way that give me the power to grow into being the true masterpiece that I was created to be. And I, for one, am so grateful to have this precious gift!

Gambill reminds us that, “Knowing who you are is a gift you give yourself and others around you.” This Christmas, will you unwrap and embrace your unique gifts and be free to be you? I dare you!

Happy holidays!

xoxoxo

Andrea