On the rare occasions that my adult children and long-time spouse are together and I suggest some action or decision, inevitably one of them spouts off, “Mom Said!”, and then they all laugh. It is not meant as an insult and I have grown used to it. In researching how this came to be, I asked my husband, who replied, “I don’t know. It is something funny from when the kids were little”. Being of no help, I asked my son. He told me the story of when he and his sister were little and I went to work at the hospital, I would always leave lists of things for them to do before I got home. The lists, customized for each child, and even occasionally for my husband, contained chores, homework tips, reminders, clothing suggestions, schedules, and life behaviors such as “be nice to your sister/brother”, “don’t fight”, “don’t fill up on junk food”, or “no, you cannot go someplace without calling and clearing it with me first”. Isn’t that what all working mothers do who angst over leaving their children at home in the care of a babysitter or even their father?
My son further explained that the lists that I left were to be carried out or they would face the wrath of Mom. Dad, who tried to imitate this and leave his lists, were viewed as mere suggestions, and mostly ignored. If Mom said it, or left it in a list, it was the rule of the day. Now that I think about it, I seldom came home from work to find the lists undone or if things were not completed, there were usually pretty good reasons. The lists continued even when the kids went off to college and a bit into their married life.
Now that both children are well into their adult lives, the words “Mom Said”, are followed by the words, “That’s it”, meaning mom’s decision is final and to be followed. Of course, all three of them still laugh when saying it. Am I insulted over this? I think not. It is a mom’s job and God-given duty to mold and shape their children’s lives. No one can deny the importance of a mother in the life of her children. Unique ways exist to help teach and train a child. Mine happened to be lists of “Mom Said!” As the mother, I knew I had to affect the moral and spiritual part of my children’s character so that hopefully they would assimilate these desired behaviors, even if they came from lists. I like to think I was successful as I have two healthy, well-adjusted, happily married children, with great careers who practice Christian beliefs. The bonus is two wonderful grandchildren. What better testimony to a mother’s love and devotion than that?
One final thought, I hear on the sly that both of my kids also make lists. The “Mom Said!” tradition continues!
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