{"id":6708,"date":"2015-11-20T10:57:15","date_gmt":"2015-11-20T16:57:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lovingonme.com\/?p=6708"},"modified":"2017-03-16T12:46:03","modified_gmt":"2017-03-16T17:46:03","slug":"does-time-heal-all-wounds","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lovingonme.com\/2017\/2015\/11\/20\/does-time-heal-all-wounds\/","title":{"rendered":"Does Time Heal All Wounds?"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Time<\/a>It’s been said through the ages that time heals all wounds, but lately I’ve been wondering, does it really? Does time, in and of itself, have healing power? Does it\u00a0work for some types of wounds, but not others? Or is it what we do with our time that really matters, determining if we heal, or simply learn to carry our hurts for the long haul?<\/p>\n

Perhaps it’s my recent surgery, and slower than I’d like recovery, that has spurred\u00a0this line of thinking. Encouraging myself to be patient with me, has reminded me of how everything in life is a process.\u00a0It takes time to heal, and as I recently discovered, a few other things as well. Most of these are what my parents would call common sense. But as I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized that while the sense may be common, the application of it surely is not.<\/p>\n

So here’s my practical advice on what to do when we’re hurting, so that over time, we can heal.<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. First and foremost, we gotta acknowledge we’re hurting.<\/strong> So often we poo poo away our hurts. We convince our selves they aren’t as bad as they seem, so we can quickly resume life as normal. But all that does is prolong our problems. We’ll never heal from what we refuse to acknowledge, no matter how much time passes by. This is especially true for our emotional and spiritual wounds, which often have no outward symptoms, but internally tear us apart. If we want to get better in time, then we have to acknowledge our hurts and take actions, that in time, change the outcome.<\/li>\n
  2. Second, we have to stop re-injuring our selves.<\/strong> Ugh!! This happens when we (meaning me) get impatient and try to do too much too soon. We know we’re hurt, but we want to get well quick, so that we don’t fall behind. But guess what? There is nothing more important than our healing. The things we feel we should be doing can wait. The passage of time must be coupled with our patience in the process, in order for true healing to take place. (By the way, this is also true of relationship hurts. If we’re still stinging because of\u00a0what boo did, it’s probably not a good time for us to be on the hunt for another honey.)<\/li>\n
  3. Third,\u00a0we have to stop hanging around\u00a0what hurt us in the first place.<\/strong>\u00a0When we’re 5 years old, this is so easy. We touch a hot stove, it hurts like hell, and we’re clear, we don’t ever\u00a0want to do\u00a0that again. But as adults, we struggle to come to the same basic conclusion. We\u00a0know something or someone is hurting us, but rather than choose to do something about it, we often spend a ridiculous amount of time\u00a0justifying it, eventually convincing our selves it really isn’t that bad, or that next time, the same experience will\u00a0yield different results. He said he won’t hit me anymore, so I’m going to stay. She said she’ll stop talking to me that way, so I’ll overlook her hurtful words.\u00a0I know drinking so\u00a0much isn’t good for me, but I need this to take the edge off. I’m so stressed.\u00a0<\/em>This is what we tell our selves so that we can normalize deviance, rather than courageously choose a different path. But if we want the hurting to stop, and healing to begin, we have to break away from what’s causing the hurt. There are some situations time will not make better, until we make better choices.<\/li>\n
  4. Fourth, we have to ask for and accept help.<\/strong> Pride cometh before a fall, and it often\u00a0prevents\u00a0us\u00a0from getting back up, especially if we\u00a0can’t do it on your own. We just\u00a0refuse to be realistic about our\u00a0limitations. Instead, we\u00a0wear\u00a0our independence like a badge of honor, never realizing the pin on the back of the badge\u00a0is stabbing\u00a0us in the chest. Isn’t it ironic that the very thing we take such delight in is actually doing us in? Yep – that independent spirit that we are so proud of is actually what’s keeping us stuck in place. This\u00a0may sound strange but I’ve come to the conclusion that God did not design us for independence. Instead, we are meant to be\u00a0interdependent, intricately supporting each other with\u00a0our unique strengths.\u00a0This business of living is too big to handle by our selves. We need each other, and the sooner we realize that it’s okay to ask for and accept help, the better off we’ll be. Because we can get things done a whole lot quicker, together, and that includes the process of healing.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Real and lasting healing is the kind that lets us grow<\/strong> forward<\/strong><\/em>, rather than just go on down the block. It means we can let go of the baggage and bitterness of the past, while carrying the lessons with us for a lifetime. It means the scars from our wounds, are\u00a0just a part of our story, not\u00a0something that locks us in shame and self-judgement.<\/p>\n

    If you’re in need of that kind of healing, don’t just sit idly by, expecting time to take care of what ails you. Time marks the days, but in and of itself, it doesn’t create change. If we want to truly heal, not just carry our hurts for the long haul, let’s couple the passage of time with some practical action that allows us to not just get over things, but to get complete.<\/p>\n

    I am praying for you! Hugs and Love\u00a0\u2764<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    It’s been said through the ages that time heals all wounds, but lately I’ve been wondering, does it really? Does time, in and of itself, have healing power? Does it\u00a0work for some types of wounds, but not others? Or is it what we do with our time that really matters, determining if we heal, or […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":12215,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"sharing_disabled":false,"switch_like_status":false,"spay_email":"","footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":""},"categories":[204997546,114917237],"tags":[347566,12188,204997597,122792808,204997804],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/lovingonme.com\/2017\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/Time-to-Heal.jpg","jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p4eAxC-1Kc","jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lovingonme.com\/2017\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6708"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lovingonme.com\/2017\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lovingonme.com\/2017\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lovingonme.com\/2017\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lovingonme.com\/2017\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6708"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lovingonme.com\/2017\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6708\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9427,"href":"https:\/\/lovingonme.com\/2017\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6708\/revisions\/9427"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lovingonme.com\/2017\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/12215"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lovingonme.com\/2017\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6708"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lovingonme.com\/2017\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6708"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lovingonme.com\/2017\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6708"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}